Saturday, March 8, 2008

The next 30 years are going to SUCK

The Boston Globe recently ran a list of the 30 fastest growing jobs in the US. Their source was the Bureau of Labor Statistics' Occupational Outlook Handbook and Career Guide to Industries.

Here's the list:
  1. physician's assistants
  2. physical therapists
  3. manicurists and pedicurists
  4. environmental science and protection technicians
  5. Gaming and sports book writers and runners
  6. software engineers
  7. database administrators
  8. computer system analysts
  9. dental assistants
  10. marriage and family therapists
  11. mental health and substance abuse social workers
  12. mental health counselors
  13. dental hygienists
  14. forensic science technicians
  15. pharmacy technicians
  16. physical therapist assistants
  17. gaming surveillance officers and gaming investigators
  18. social and human service assistants
  19. financial analysts
  20. skin care specialists
  21. substance abuse and behavioral disorder counselors
  22. veterinarians
  23. medical assistants
  24. theatrical and performance makeup artists
  25. personal financial advisers
  26. veterinary technologists and technicians
  27. computer applications software engineers
  28. home health aides
  29. personal and home care aides
  30. network systems and data communications analysts
This is depressing. Apparently over the next 30 years we're going to be waiting on the damn Baby Boomers in their dotage (having fucked up the whole country on their watch, now they want us to take care of their aches and pains in retirement too, while paying us shit). To distract ourselves from our economic pain and dead-end jobs, we'll be dousing ourselves with drugs and begging therapists to put us back together, murdering each other in droves (hence the forensics), gambling heavily, and owning a lot of pets . Meanwhile, a few computer types will get some careers outsourced from India once their standard of living and payscale exceeds ours. At least with all the makeup artists, pedicurists, and manicurists we'll look fabulous while the nation circles the drain.

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